Putting the Monster to Bed

Day 3 of Recess. Lovely. Just lovely.

Xecpt….

Monster doesn’t seem to know when it’s nighty-night time.

Monster wants to have committee meetings and plan and poke at me at 3 am.

Noooo, Monster. Mama needs her rest.

We’ve had talks, I’ve offered Ambien, brandy, a silky eye mask. Nothing works.

So tonight I’m putting the mister to bed. Literally.

Like a shoebox-by-the-nightstand-or-maybe-underneath-so-husband-doesn’t-think-I’m-crazy-bed.

Like this:

Monster's Nigh Nigh

What do you think, Monster?

woa woa woa

Well, ya, I know it’s not cashmere.

woa woa woa woa?

Yes, you can still have the Ambien and the brandy and the silky eye mask.

Ok… and slumber parties on Saturday nights. But no brandy. I know how much you guys drink and somebody’s bound to wet the bed.

All right, but that’s it. One bedtime story a night. Yes I know rituals are important.

***

For my friends concerned that I came back from the Destuckification Retreat talking about fairies and playing with stuffed animals, no worries. I mean, I really am doing those things, but I hope that by symbolically putting the monster to bed I can ease my mind… tame the beast… get some goddamn rest.

After we establish a new pattern, hopefully I won’t have to literally put a 3-inch, pink-skinned, stuffed toy dragon into a box and cover it up with blankies. I’ll be able to metaphorically do so.

Speaking of metaphors… tune in tomorrow for sparkly-eyed fairies…

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8 Responses to “Putting the Monster to Bed”


  1. 1 alicia February 3, 2010 at 9:58 pm

    schmoooches! can’t wait for the sparkly fairies. what colour will i be?

  2. 2 journey4yogis February 3, 2010 at 11:00 pm

    goodnight monster. sleep sweet!

  3. 3 elizabeth February 4, 2010 at 1:58 am

    Good night, dear little monster!

    I put mine on the window ledge behind my computer. I can’t see him there. So far, he doesn’t seem to mind this at all .. probably because I have been diligent about Shiva Nata and so my mind is extremely quiet. But I shall remember your “putting your monster to bed” idea for future use. But he totally doesn’t get cashmere. I don’t get to sleep in cashmere, so I am certainly not letting him do so. ;)

    So glad your recess is going well!

    • 4 blogasana February 4, 2010 at 5:26 pm

      oye, you’re so good about the shiva nata. only once for me… thanks for the reminder. do you use the dvd?

      monster and i slept so well last night i didn’t want to get him up! ya, nobody in our house gets cashmere either =)

      • 5 elizabeth February 4, 2010 at 9:57 pm

        Ha. I wasn’t diligent before. But after I saw what 6 days in a row was like .. I was inspired.

        I do use the DVD, though I’ve been putting it on mute and playing music with it. It is really hard for me to *not* move in time with a beat, so it’s a good extra challenge because Andrey and the beat don’t usually match.

  4. 6 Tami February 4, 2010 at 2:19 am

    poor monster… too tired to sleep. that happens to mine sometimes too. tuck him in and kiss him on the forehead.

    i hope you both sleep well tonight.

    promises of sparkly eyed fairies and i’m not sure i’m sleeping at all tonight!

  5. 7 Jfrancisco February 8, 2010 at 5:18 am

    There are lots of things I could say about presence or lack of monsters, etc., but what I want to say is that the pictures of your monster are just SO dang CUTE! I love it! Totally put a smile on my face. But I also hope he isn’t bothering you as much anymore. In all seriousness, they are no fun.
    I hope your month off is going well so far. xo

    • 8 blogasana February 10, 2010 at 5:25 am

      thanks, jenna!! he is pretty cute, huh? hard to stay mad at him =)

      we *are* getting along a little better. not denying hard feelings helps. stuffing them just makes them stronger, or so it seems.

      my month off is GREAT! i’m so so thankful. hope you and the family are well… hope to see you soon! (maybe book club??) xoxo


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